At some point, writing here started to feel like another obligation instead of the pleasure it usually is. I shifted my writing to my vanilla life, and that felt right.
Today, I’ve been sitting here for a bit trying to figure out how I’m doing. I mean, I’m ok. I’m not freaking out. I’m not depressed – at least, not in a “clinically depressed” way. I have some moments of sadness, a moment of rage one day. I know how lucky I am in my situation when it could be so much more difficult.
The other day, I had a thought that haunts me a bit. What would happen to us if we didn’t have internet access? It may seem inconceivable, but it’s not impossible. Who would have imagined our current situation? And if we want to dive deeper into the realm of nightmares, what if we lost cell phone service too?
You know, back in my youth, we didn’t have internet or cell phones. I was in my early 30’s before those things were common for many people. But I can NOT imagine it anymore, especially now. I guess we’d survive, but omg. I’m grateful for internet and cell phones in a big way.
Ultimately, when I’m able to feel centered and present, I come back to holding all of you in my heart. Breathing with this and sending love:
May you be peaceful, May you be healthy, May you be safe, May you awaken to the light of your true nature, May you be free.