Things i never knew…

i was masturbating and having orgasms long before i connected it with the word for orgasm.

i was having orgasms long before i knew there was a clitoris.

i was having sex long before i knew that the-thing-that-happened-that-felt-good when i masturbated was the thing people were talking about that was supposed to happen – or could happen – when you had sex.

And i had a fairly progressive mother – i knew all the actual facts of life long before most of my friends.  i just didn’t connect the dots on the whole orgasm thing.  Or know about the clit.

Unlike these French students, who are going to know more than i knew before yesterday.  Check out this article:  How a 3D clitoris will help teach French schoolchildren about sex.

Among the things from the article that i didn’t know is this:

“…pupils will learn that the clitoris is made up of the same tissue as the penis. That it is divided into crura or legs, bulbs, foreskin and a head. That the only difference between a clitoris and a penis is that most of the female erectile tissue is internal – and that it’s often longer, at around 8 inches.”

That is pretty amazing.  So really, the difference in male and female sex organs is that the male’s are external and ours are internal.  i have heard that said – literally that – but had thought they were talking about the vagina being inside us.  NOT the same thing at all.

And i would have said i thought the clit was kind of “outside.”  Even though i had read in recent years that what we think of as the clit is just the tip of the iceberg, so to speak, i had no idea.  And i’m feeling kinda cheated.  Remember, i’m 60, i have been having sex now for going on 50 years.

The rest of my life might have been different, f i had known 35 or 40 years ago what Odile Fillod, who did the clitoris sculpture, says:

“It’s important that women have a mental image of what is actually happening in their body when they’re stimulated,… In understanding the key role of the clitoris, a woman can stop feeling shame, or [that she’s] abnormal if penile-vaginal intercourse doesn’t do the trick for her – given the anatomical data, that is the case for most women.”

Also, this struck me.  According to the article, when Suzann Gage was looking for images of the clit, she found “that her best information came from medical textbooks of the 1800s – when anatomical drawings were done from cadavers. So images of the clitoris might have existed for a long time but, on realizing that it played no direct part in reproduction, the medical profession chose to ignore it.”  (Bold and italics added.)

That just figures, doesn’t it?

Ok, i won’t be bitter.  It’s too late in my life to be bitter, and i think it’s great for all those little French boys and girls that they’ll get to learn the rest of the story.  It’ll be at least another hundred years before it’s taught in schools here.  Sigh.  So i’m spreading the news as best i can.

The clit.  More amazing than you knew.


The image is also available as a pendant.  How cool is that?

Sunday Check-in; 5-1-16

Whoa, another week gone by, another check-in, another general lack of any progress in any area.


No increase in exercise, and no weight loss and i didn’t do stuff i thought about doing that would have been fun and good for me.  i did some binge eating and read two books from the Masters of The Castle series, which is a lot like candy for the brain.

i did some work stuff effectively, and dug myself out of an emotional pit that had captured me.  i was not as productive as i would have liked.  i blogged here every day, but no where else.

i felt a lot of sadness about my relationship with MP.  It’s like living with a dear friend who’s not in good health.  i love him, and don’t want to end our relationship, and i still want the things i thought we were going to have which proved elusive.  He is not able to give me those things.  A Gordian knot to untangle.

In other news – today is May 1, May Day, or Beltane.

Beltane kicks off the merry month of May, and has a long history. This fire festival is celebrated on May 1 with bonfires, Maypoles, dancing, and lots of good old fashioned sexual energy. The Celts honored the fertility of the gods with gifts and offerings, sometimes including animal or human sacrifice”.

i found so many images to share:


And then i saw this – suggestions of how to create your own Beltane ritual.  This is one with a focus on Honoring the Sacred Feminine with a Goddess Ritual.  It starts with decorating your altar – and i have an altar, of sorts, i just haven’t used it in a long time, and it’s not set up at all anymore and MP’s dirty clothes baskets are taking up a lot of space around it.  So i have some work to do just to get started.

In the ritual, i would start with a prayer to the Four Directions, which i have not done in a very long time.  Then i would call on the goddesses – Isis and Ishtar and others who i don’t know, adding Hecate to the list they suggest.   Hecate – goddess of journeys – is mine, the one that resonates with me, the one i follow.

The ritual goes on to name and honor the women in my life who have touched me, and that’s a long list.  Finally, naming myself and honoring the mysterious and sacred feminine that flows through me – and through you too, even if you are male, because feminine energy is within all of us.

Just thinking about doing it feels good, and i need to figure out where in this house i can carve out some space just for myself.  i have clutter and crap i need to get rid of, and MP has even more than i do.  But today i need to not get overwhelmed with doing the whole house, i just need to find some sacred space for myself.

Your sacred space is where you can

find yourself again and again.

~~ Joseph Campbell