i can't seem to hold my goals in my head - or keep them in front of me the way i'd like to. i wasn't as productive as i'd like to be this week, i didn't do any of the things that i've talked about wanting to do. i've exercised a couple of times, but … Continue reading Sunday Check-in 5-15
Just me
BDSM and me
i am realizing that i have a full-blown philosophy about BDSM. (In case anyone still thinks that being submissive means not having your own opinions - um, no. It doesn't mean that.) My concept of BDSM... ...requires clear, specific consent. You can consent to not having a safe-word, you can consent to non-consensual consent if you … Continue reading BDSM and me
In the light of day
“Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.” -Alan Cohen Finding my balance again - somewhere between … Continue reading In the light of day
A Hypocrite
i am a hypocrite. And at the moment, awash in shame. Yeah. The only way out of that is by changing my actions so they match my values. i know this. There's no reason to talk about what i'm going to do, or make excuses for why i haven't already, i just need to fucking do … Continue reading A Hypocrite
Just Chillin’
Being on vacation is lovely. i have not even been thinking too hard about stuff. It's funny, for a day or two i was thinking about practices i could start that would increase my sense of submission. In particular, the blog i was talking about before, he did this lovely post about that, you can … Continue reading Just Chillin’
Three more days…
Three more days til my mini-vacation; i am super-excited. But also trying to stay in the moment since the vacation doesn't start for 3 more days! i was super-productive yesterday, but doubt if i can sustain that level of excellence the rest of the week. Plus, i worked 12 hours to accomplish what i did. … Continue reading Three more days…
Too Tired
Shygirl wrote a lovely post about being sleepy - you may want to read it here, because she says it so well. All i could think was, "Oh! Me too!!" i don't know why i'm so tired - i'm even waking up kind of tired, even when i get up at my normal time. i … Continue reading Too Tired
Thinking…
i was wondering today when and how i began to think of myself as unfocused and disorganized. No, wait, that's not quite right, but i began to think of myself as "not focused enough," and "not organized enough." i think that i've been missing the point. i can be super focused and super organized ~ when … Continue reading Thinking…
Sunday Check-in 4-23-16
i went for a walk yesterday, and the day before, which was really nice. There's a park not too far away - ok, i have to drive to it - but it's really nice. And i played some music. This: (Sacred Spirit Drums; David and Steve Gordon) And this: (Squeeze Box; The Who) And … Continue reading Sunday Check-in 4-23-16
Insatiable
i was thinking tonight - i had a hard day at work, hard in ways that my job is not usually difficult - and had been feeling a bit overwhelmed and wanting support - and i was thinking that it would be nice if My Partner (MP) responded to text messages with more than one … Continue reading Insatiable
Olivia 