TBT on M for CWS

Don’t you love acronyms?  FYI, that’s Throw Back Thursday on Monday for Cock Worshiping Subs.  This post is from a blog i used to have, long ago in a different lifetime.  “Sir” was First Sir, the first Dom I called Sir.

I’m curious to see how this post from 2010 lands with those of you that didn’t know me then.  This is more sexually explicit than most of what i write these days, but it flows so nicely with the whole CWS concept.  Anyhow.  With no further ado, I present:

Cock Worship

i am kneeling.  Of course.  He is sitting in front of me, his cock in his hand. I rock back on my heels, tilt my head, eyebrows raised, smile slightly.  “May i?” i ask hopefully.  “Please?”

“No.” He says.  “Not yet.”

A shiver goes through me, my pussy clenches.  Why does being denied turn me on?  i lower my eyes demurely, watching the cock still in his hand.  

He strokes it a little.  I nibble on my lower lip.  Waiting.  Anticipation making me wetter.

What is it about a cock that’s so fascinating?  So desirable?  So hot? 

An analyst I know, I’ll call him JM,  might say it’s cock envy.   He insists that on some level men envy women for our power to carry life, to give birth.  And that women envy men for their cocks.  I struggle to figure out what that means exactly. 

I know I don’t want to be a man.  I can’t think of a lot of things men can do that I can’t do.  You know, write their name in the snow.  I’m not tempted by that.   I don’t think I want my own cock.

I don’t think I want my own cock

Or do i?  Maybe not to keep.  

i kneel before Him, still waiting for permission.  i want to put my mouth over His cock, breathing on it, warming it with my breath.  Close my mouth over it, wet and warm, licking the head til it’s wet.

i want to hold His cock at the base, holding it still while i lick the head with the flat of my tongue, as if it were an ice cream cone.  Licking all around as if it would melt otherwise.

Then with the tip of my tongue, running it around the rim,  just under the rim.  Pausing to attend to the opening, licking gently, delicately.  Caressing with my tongue that ridge where the vein runs, pulsing so fiercely i can see it throb.

Licking my way from the base up that vein, pressing just hard enough that a drop of precum emerges – and is licked away again.  Ahhhh.

i’ve always liked sucking cock – obviously, not just anyone’s cock.  You know, in the context of relationship.  i always thought it was a powerful act of love. 

i understand there are women who don’t feel that way, who truly don’t like to do it.  And even for me, in an unhappy relationship, it can lose its charm and become a chore rather than a delight. 

i understand there are women who think it’s humiliating, who see it as subservient and a powerless stance  for a woman to kneel at her man’s feet and serve his cock.   Maybe i wouldn’t like it either if i saw it that way.   i think they think it puts the man in a position of superiority, makes them inferior.  

And i guess if i talk about cock worship, and you think that means worshiping the man attached to the cock -well, that would be a whole different thing, wouldn’t it?  Because really, it’s not so much about Him.

This is Min, an Egyptian god. As you can see, He’s not the sexless god associated with Christianity.

i discovered a wonderful web site about cock worship,  for real, not just in a BDSM sense.  Here’s the link:


Here’s another picture of Min:

The article comment on this picture:

Min was an ancient Egyptian god of fertility. In Egyptian art and statues, Min is always shown holding his cock with his left hand and a threshing flail in his raised right hand. A flail, in case you’re wondering, is a kind of whip used to separate grain, or judging from the erection, to beat the shit out of some particularly adventurous woman who’s been naughty and needs to be punished. ”

Isn’t that great?

i am still kneeling, still waiting.  He is stroking Himself, torturing me by denying me access to His cock. 

i feel sorry for women who don’t know the power of pleasuring His cock.  When my mouth closes on Him, His cock becomes mine, for the moment.  Mmmhmmm.  Really.  i own it.  Believe me.  He gives it to me.

That may have been a secret, maybe i wasn’t supposed to tell You that.   Maybe that will make it too scary.

JM, the analyst, says that men are afraid of women, afraid of “going in.”  

“We got out once,” he says, meaning in birth, “Will we get out again?”

i smiled when he said it, but i can see that it may be true, in that Jungian, archetypal way.

i am rocked back on my heels, kneeling, waiting.  Not inferior, not humbled.  More like a priestess.


When He allows me to, i’ll make his cock slippery wet, slide my mouth up and down til He is lost in pleasure.  i guess it could be scary.  (Wicked smile.)

But the Dominant man knows ways to keep control.    He makes me ask permission.  He tells me what to do.   He grasps my hair, right there at the base of my neck, and He decides how deep or shallow i can go.

He may push me down hard, so all my focus is on relaxing the back of my throat as he presses against it.  He may, at any second, say, “Remove,” and i will have to stop.  Sadly, reluctantly, but obediently..

It is part of the beauty of submission.  Together, He and i work to serve the Cock in a way that is pleasing to – Him.  The phallic power.


Phallic power is something to be worshiped.  A force to be reckoned with. 

i can see why a man would feel better with a submissive woman at His feet.   i can see why a man would want to give detailed instructions.  It increases my respect for male subs, who have the courage to hand themselves over to a domme – how scary!  Although, i guess it’s another way to be safe.

Hover, breathe through my mouth, close, lick, go down slowly, one half inch at a time, bury it, then back up, slowly and methodically, and remove.

Those were Sir’s instructions.  i think it takes two to cock worship correctly, and i appreciate the guidance.  

But i don’t do too badly on my own initiative either.  

His cock is wet and slippery, my mouth moving quickly, rhythmically, up and down, making him wetter, harder.  It hits the back of my throat hard. Every 3rd or 4th time, i gag a little.  When it gets to be too much, i go a little more shallow, licking, swirling my tongue around.  i can feel the vein throbbing, if i put my finger on the base of his cock, i can tell he’s getting close.   

And we can wait, we can make it last a long time.  Until it cries out for completion, until He’s ready, His cock is ready, and at last He releases –  over the top Himself, much to my satisfaction.   Cum shooting forth,  fertility expressed, The Cock is pleased.

That’s what cock worship is about.  For me. 

What does it mean to you?


10 thoughts on “TBT on M for CWS

  1. That holds up incredibly well. *fans self.*
    And fascinating, digging in to the power exchange that happens between D and s – goes it flows back and forth.

    Of course, I’m one of those who has “known” you (at least has been reading your blog) since 2010 so I most likely also read this when it was originally written.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Omigoodness, thank you so much for commenting!! And thank you for the kind words. You probably did read it back in the day then – and wow, we’ve know each other a long time. ❤


  2. I love your preface, Olivia … where you say you’re curious as to where this lands with those who didn’t know you then. I assume that is because the topic and writing is more graphic than what you present on your current blog? If that’s the case, I can say it lands just fine for me. For myself, I sometimes find blogging can be a bit of a struggle when you feel you need to keep your audience in mind … hugs … nj

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hey, NJ – thanks for commenting! For sure, I wasn’t concerned about my audience when I wrote this! It is more graphic than what I wrote here, but I don’t think I am as invested in exploring things like phallic energy either, so there’s that. I’m glad you didn’t think it was too graphic, of course. Hugs…


    • Oh, I’m glad you liked it!! I don’t remember CWS, tbh. So no, I don’t think I did – when was it? I think i must have missed it… But I think that’s a brilliant idea.


    • Thanks Lea. I really appreciate this feedback. It feels to me like someone else wrote it too, just a little bit. It was 8 years ago, in a different life, after all. But that’s what I really wanted to know – would it seem that way to you. I just meant I knew it was different because it was more graphic than the person I am writes today. I wondered if it just seemed as different a voice as it seems to me. Thanks.


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