This is Part IV of a story that started as a snippet from my drafts long ago.  Thanks to James X Morgan’s interest in the story, we’re continuing to co-create Delilah’s adventures with Master Graham.  You can find the posts here on my blog, and on James’ blog Tall Tales.

Part 1, originally named A Tantalizing Opportunity, now called Delilah’s Adventures with Master Graham: Intro is on my blog here and on James’ blog here.

Part 2, Meeting, is on my blog here and on James’ blog here.

Part 3, Demonstration, is on my blog here and on James’ blog here.

MG led Delilah onto the stage.

‘Alan, this is Delilah. She’s come to inspect your handiwork.’

Sir Alan smiled.

‘How were the demonstrations, did you find them instructive?’

Delilah just stared for a moment.  Instructive?  Exciting, arousing, a little bit scary…  but she pulled herself together.  “Yes, um, very instructive,” and she couldn’t hold back a tiny smirk.

Sir Alan twitched an eyebrow at MG. MG’s features were passive, but his eyes were expressive.

‘I see. Well if you want to inspect the results, you’d better come round here.’

Feeling like she was in a strange land, Delilah followed him so she stood directly behind Katie. ‘I’m looking at welts – actual welts, not just reading about it,’ she thought, acutely aware of her own body, but as if in a dream.

The audience had largely filtered away after offering their thanks and congratulations. MG touched Delilah lightly on the shoulder.

‘And this, as you know, is Katie. Katie, Delilah. Delilah is conducting some research into BDSM and trauma – fascinating.’

Katie had twisted round to look at the marks on her bottom. She turned to Delilah and smiled, resting her head in her palms as Sir Alan gently applied some arnica gel. 

‘Hello Delilah, did you enjoy the demo?’

Delilah smiled, “It seems wrong to say I enjoyed watching you get – you know, get caned, Katie.  I know that hurt!  But it was – at the same time, it was amazing.  Have you been doing all this a long time?” 

‘Oh, me? About 18 months actively but I’d wondered about it for ages before that. I was lucky enough to meet Sir Alan and he, sort of, took me in hand, so to speak.’

‘Flattery will get you almost everywhere.’

Sir Alan’s quiet comment was accompanied by a raised eyebrow. 

Katie giggled conspiratorially at Delilah. 

‘And how about you. How long have you been…’

“Oh, I’m not!”  Delilah blushed, “I mean, I’m – I’m doing some research – but I haven’t – this is my first time even seeing what it’s like.  But – ” Delilah moved towards the front so Katie didn’t have to twist to see her, “Can I ask you a question?”

‘Anything. Fire away!’

In a lower tone, Delilah said, “What’s it like?  I mean, what’s it really like?”

‘Well… where do I start? It’s not just submitting to someone and being spanked, it’s being noticed, recognised, cared for, valued…  of course it hurts but even that can be, well, stimulating, not… somehow not un-nice. You’d have to see for yourself.’

Katie blushed, the colour spreading down to her breasts. Then she winked at Delilah. 

‘But I bet you’ve already thought about that, haven’t you? Well you’re in good hands with Master Graham. Ow!’

Sir Alan had landed a sharp slap on her rump.

‘Katie, behave! Come here and don’t embarrass our guest.’

Katie grinned at Delilah as she climbed down from the bench.

‘See you again I hope.’

Delilah tried to look like she wasn’t watching them, but she couldn’t help listening.

Sir Alan took Katie by the shoulders.

‘All ok, naughty girl?’

‘Yes Sir, very ok thank you!’

Sir Alan pulled her in for a hug and rubbed her back for a moment before releasing her. 

‘You’d better put some clothes on and hang up those canes. Come and find me later.’

‘Yes Sir.’

‘Oh Anna, are you still there? Is there anything I can do for you?’

Anna looked up slowly and smiled as she gradually focussed on Sir Alan’s kindly features. 

‘I wonder, Sir, if you’d be kind enough to release me. Would you have a moment Sir, please?’ 

‘Hmmm. What do we think, Delilah? Should we let her go now? Has she been good?’

Startled, Delilah looked over – embarrassed that she had not even noticed poor Anna, still tied and kneeling, surprised that Sir Alan was asking her about it. “Me?  Do I think – yes, of course, I think you should let her go.  I’m sure she’s been good.”   

She felt strange about being asked for her opinion, and yet it made her feel included.  And it almost distracted her from wondering what it would be like to be spanked herself.  Not caned, that was too extreme for her, but a spanking…

She mentally shook herself.  No, she was not going to do anything crazy tonight.

MG had been watching Delilah’s exchanges, quietly amused at her confusion but ready to step in at any moment if she should show signs of being overwhelmed. He moved to her side as they watched Sir Alan carefully untie Anna’s bonds and steady her as she stood and stretched out her limbs.

‘You’ve been very good Anna. All ok?’

‘A bit spaced out Sir, but ok I think.’

Sir Alan took his jacket off the chair and put it round her shoulders, guiding her gently towards the stairs. 

‘Let’s find you something to drink and bring you back to earth, shall we? We can deal with the ropes later.’

MG turned to Delilah. 

‘Well my dear, was that anything like what you expected? Shall we find our table again and digest?’

But Delilah was still watching Anna and Sir Alan.  She turned to Graham.  “Do you think she knew he was going to leave her there all this time?”

‘Now that’s an excellent question. Shall we perhaps head upstairs before I answer?’

“Yes, please, Graham, let’s sit down somewhere, this is a lot to take in.”

MG offered a crooked arm and motioned towards the stairs.

‘It is a lot. The questions will keep coming over the coming hours and days as you make and review your notes and digest all that you’ve seen and heard. As I’ve already said, please don’t hesitate to ask me about them. Now, some more tea perhaps? Something else?’ 

“Yes, more tea, please, and maybe some water?”  She watched him make his way across the room, pausing as people greeted him.  He seemed so self-confident and comfortable with who he was.  What would it be like to be spanked by him?

MG set down the drinks on the table and sat opposite Delilah. 

‘How are you feeling, my dear? Shall I try to answer your question?

Delilah smiled, “I’m fascinated by all of this, and yes, I’d love to hear your thoughts.”

‘So, what was Anna expecting? Well, whatever she was expecting, the reality would have been different – a submissive never really knows what their Dominant has in mind but has agreed, perhaps just for a scene, perhaps longer, to submit without question to whatever their Dominant decides. With me so far? Do you need to take notes?’

Delilah leaned forward, “To submit without question – that’s so intense.  I can’t imagine…”  But she could imagine, she could feel it in her body, the rush of letting go of her responsibility, focusing on pleasing the other…  She took a long breath, “I’m with you, no need for notes right now, I’m good.”

‘Good. Now this level of submission doesn’t just happen, certainly not for any dynamic that lasts beyond a single scene – although it might sometimes start that way. There will have been a period of getting to know each other, a discussion of wishes and limits, a building of trust. It’s only when this trust has been established that a sub might choose to submit, unconditionally, knowing that the Dom will not push them too far. Ok?’

“Yes.”  Delilah was entranced with the idea of agreeing on wishes and limits.  She had known that was part of it before, but now she had some vivid images of what it looked like in action.  

‘So, it is possible that Anna and Sir Alan might have discussed beforehand exactly how the scene would play out. If Anna had been an audience volunteer and they’d not known each other well, there would certainly have been a discussion of plans and limits. But Anna and Sir Alan do know each other well and have played together before. So I suspect Anna happily agreed to be Sir Alan’s rope bunny this evening without knowing what would happen but trusting that she would be cared for whatever happened. And that’s part of the attraction of submission – the sub hands over control to the Dom, no longer has any responsibility for what happens, simply does as instructed, submits to the will of the Dom. That can be very liberating. So to answer your question directly, I doubt Anna knew that she would be left like that but I’m sure she submitted willingly to being bound, displayed, ignored, to being forced to be a helpless witness to Katie’s caning, not knowing what Sir Alan had planned for her next. You saw her at the end: a little spaced out but not at all distressed and happy to be cared for by Sir Alan. Hmm. I went on a bit didn’t I?’

“Oh – no, not at all. This is exactly what I want to hear.”  His words echoed in her mind – “bound, displayed, ignored” – the sensations that brought up – “simply does as instructed,” everything in her wanted to know how that felt.  In that moment, she wanted him to touch her.  Her nipples ached to be played with, the heat between her legs was unrelenting, and the image – over his knee, skirts up, one hand slowly pulling her panties down… Her lips parted and she caught her breath. She wanted that.

Swallowing hard, she took a big drink of her water.  Tried to shake off the intensity of her desire.  “That is – ” she wanted to talk about the trust that developed between Dom and sub.  To point out that trust, and safety, were at the heart of how kink helped heal past trauma.  But instead, “That is so seductive,” she said.  

Then, blushing all the way to her toes, she quickly added, “Not that you’re trying to seduce me, I’m not saying that at all!  But the idea of it. The concept of trusting someone enough that you could actually give yourself to them…  That you would just focus on – on obeying them.”  Just saying that word “obeying” sent a rush of pleasure through her body that went straight to the heat at her core.

‘It is intense, isn’t it? The feelings, the emotions, the desires can play havoc with the mind. That’s why trust is so important; it helps avoid anyone being taken advantage of.’

“Yes, I can see that.  Do Doms feel it that strongly too?”

‘I think Doms have a responsibility to ensure, to check, as best they can, that the sub trusts them before exercising their dominance. And then to ensure they respect the sub and their limits so as to avoid abusing that trust, to avoid even any risk of a perception of abuse. The Dom must therefore also trust the sub to communicate their needs clearly. It can be a fine line, especially when a sub is eager to experiment and the Dom is unsure whether they’re ready.’

MG looked intently at Delilah as he spoke. 

She nodded.  “That’s a lot of responsibility.  It must take a lot of self-awareness and self-control to be able to manage that.”

She paused.

“So – how do you even get started?  Like, hypothetically, let’s say there’s someone who’s new, someone who’s just curious about, you know, about what it would be like.  She doesn’t even know for real whether she’d like it or not, but she kind of wants to see.  How would she even get started?”

MG was still looking at her.

‘Good question. She, this hypothetical she, would need to make it known that she were interested. She could ask someone she knew, a sub or a Dom, for guidance and support in helping to understand what it was she was looking for and for introductions to potentially suitable Tops or Doms. That might be quite quick or it may take longer for her to recognise and accept what she wanted. And then to ask for it.’

“To ask for it?  But I thought the point of it was to do what you were told to do, to obey.  I don’t understand. Do I – would she – how would she know what to ask for?”  Delilah’s anxiety grew, “And isn’t the point to please the Dom, not ask for what I – she wants?  At least, I guess I don’t understand.”  Once again, Delilah’s heart was pounding and she was barely breathing.

MG looked at her kindly. 

‘It seems to me that you and the hypothetical person might have something in common. If I’m right, although we are still talking about a hypothetical situation, we may no longer just be talking about a hypothetical person. I am quite happy to continue talking and answering your questions but I do want us to have a way to call time out, for whatever reason, if required. So I’m going to ask you to choose a safeword. Do you understand what that means?’

Delilah thought, oh – he knows – he knows it’s me.  

But then she didn’t really care, after all, it probably wasn’t even a big deal to him.  But a safeword?

“Yes, I’ve read about safe words – if I said that word, we’d stop talking – or doing – whatever we’d been doing. I do think that’s a good idea.  If I got overwhelmed, I could let you know without even explaining, right?”

‘That’s right. If one person used the safeword, everything would stop. They would then have space to regroup and figure out what happened, or simply finish the relationship. So, would you like to choose one?’

“Yes, I think I would.”  Delilah felt like she was about to jump off a high dive into the pool.  Not sure how she would land or where this would take her, but she wanted to find out.  

“Can I – I’ve read that the classic safeword is red, like traffic lights.  That you can say yellow and it just slows down, but red means stop. Can we do that?”

‘We can do that. Red means stop, yellow means slow down. And there will never be a time when you can’t use them. It will always be ok to use them. Happy with that?’

“Yes, I am.”  Delilah liked the idea that it would always be ok to use the safe words.

‘Good. Now back to your questions. She needs –  you need – to ask so that there can be no doubt that it is what you really want. So how would you know what to ask for? This is where it would turn into a conversation. You and your guide could start by talking about types of BDSM and discipline to help you understand what would be involved, what you might like to try and, importantly, what would be off limits. By the way, nothing you decide would ever be definitive; likes and limits can change with time. Once you have an idea of what you want, it might be reasonable for you and a Top or Dom to begin to put some things into practice and see if the dynamic would really work. So the first step would be to find someone you could trust and ask for some guidance.’

“Oh.”  Delilah stared into the distance, oblivious to the other people around them.  What did she want?  “So…” she said slowly, “Let’s just say that I – or this person – wanted to find out what it would be like to get spanked…  and let’s say… that she knew somebody that knew a lot about, well, about spanking and BDSM, then maybe she could tell them that she was curious about spanking?”

She looked to Graham then, afraid that she would see judgement – or laughter – in his face.  Maybe she was just being silly.

MG leaned forward a little, his face relaxed and open, his eyes kind and encouraging. 

‘I would say to that person that many people are curious about things that are not, shall we say, mainstream but that not all of them have the courage, as this person does, to ask for help in exploring them further. And if that person were to choose to ask me for guidance, I would welcome such an opportunity. In fact I would consider it an honour and a privilege to be asked.’

“Ohhh.”  Delilah’s whole body relaxed.  She savored that feeling – the warmth that started around her heart but became heat in her core.  “Then I would like to ask for your guidance.  Please.”

‘Thank you for your trust, Delilah. I do indeed feel very privileged to have earned it. Now, would you like to tell me what you think you would like to try? So we can discuss further how that might work?’

“I don’t exactly know what I’d like – I mean, I’ve never dreamed of doing this before, not for real.  But, I guess,” she hesitated, “I would just like to experience some bit of what it would be like.  Just a taste.”

‘Very well, let’s explore a little. You have mentioned a number of things this evening: Obeying, pleasing a Dom, spanking… You asked Katie what it was really like and your reactions to certain events and conversations have demonstrated, perhaps, a little more than just professional interest. May I start by explaining what some of those aspects might involve?’

“Yes, please.”

‘If you think you might be a submissive, you could start by asking yourself how you might feel if a Dom told you to take off your clothes and kneel in front of him, arms behind your back, while he read a book, mainly ignoring you but occasionally stroking your breasts without looking at you, perhaps squeezing a nipple hard enough to cause you to gasp. How do you feel thinking about that?’

“Ohhh, um, I feel…” the words that came to mind, hot, aroused, excited were so strong, she couldn’t… “I feel interested.  I feel like I want to know, maybe I want to know what that would be like.”  

‘So, with the right person, there may be scope for some experimentation there and I am sure that could be arranged if you so choose.’

MG paused briefly, all the while looking at Delilah.

‘Now, the word spanking has come up more than once. If you think you might like to try being spanked you may wish to consider the context. Would you imagine someone just spanking you for no particular reason? Or might you prefer there to be a reason, perhaps built into a scene, a role play? Would it be playful or hard? With a hand or with implements? Who would decide when to stop? The answers to these questions may help you decide whether you might prefer a sensual, a discipline or a submissive dynamic and lead you to a starting point.’

Delilah giggled, surprising herself.  “Omg,” she said, hand to her mouth.  “It’s like a “pick-your-own-adventure” only it’s,” she giggled again, and lowered her voice, “It’s a pick-your-own spanking!”

Then she added, “I’m sorry, I don’t even know why I’m laughing.  I’ll try to be more serious.”

MG raised his eyebrows in mock surprise, smiling as he replied.

‘I’ll have you know, young lady, that this is supposed to be fun so that’s quite enough apologising. Are we clear?’

“Yes!” surprised and delighted, Delilah smiled at him.  “Thank you!”

“Well, if I’m completely honest,” she went on, “Spankings have been the main part of any fantasies I’ve had.  Not the only part, but most often.  I’ve tried not to think about it, but that hasn’t worked very well.”  

She felt an odd feeling of lightness, as if she were confessing – not sins – but sharing a part of herself that had never been seen in the light before.

‘Well now I’m encouraging you to think about it. What type of spanking would you pick?’

“Hmmmm, I think a sensual spanking sounds wonderful, although I don’t quite know what it would be like.  Well, of course I don’t,” she added, “That’s the point isn’t it?  But when I, you know, have fantasies… it’s usually like I broke some kind of rule and he spanks me,” dropping her eyes and lowering her voice, “Over his knee, or like, um bent over the bed.  Just with his hand, or his belt, or something like that.  NOT,” and her head popped up and she looked Graham in the eyes, “Not with a cane!”

MG smiled with a twinkle in his eye.

‘And there you have articulated your first limit. Not the cane. But you should know that some people find the belt more scary than the cane.’

“Oh, sweet!  That was a limit!  And I don’t know then, about the belt or the cane.  But I don’t want, I don’t think I want big welts like Katie had.  Anyhow.”

“Then after the spanking, we kind of, we make up.  The spanking’s not real, real hard – or – I guess I don’t know even what that means, how hard is hard?  But in my head, it hurts, but it doesn’t harm me.

“Then he forgives me for breaking the rule and we, you know, like I might – well, never mind, that’s not about spanking.  You get the picture though.”

‘I get the picture, and that’s another area where you should think about limits. Does that part remain a fantasy in your head or is it something you might explore further at some stage? Either way I believe strongly that aftercare is very important in any discipline or D/s relationship. The bottom or sub must feel recognised and cared for, especially when vulnerable after a scene.’

Delilah wasn’t sure that what she fantasized after the spanking was exactly aftercare, but she shrugged that off.

‘So, I wonder whether you might have found the outline for a first experimental scene – being spanked for rule-breaking with some restorative aftercare to follow. Now you just need to find someone that you would choose to Top you.’

Delilah stared at him.  “We could do that?  I mean, someone could do that with me?  For real?”

‘Certainly. If that’s what you want.’

“Can it – shouldn’t it – what if I want it to be you?”  Having said that, Delilah actually brought her thumb to her mouth and let it rest on her lower lip, as if she were stopping herself from saying more.  But then she slid the tip of it into her mouth and begin to suck, just on the very tip of it, as if she needed comfort.

MG noticed the gesture and hoped he had read it correctly. He leaned forward a little and moved his hand to the middle of the table.

‘Delilah, everything is ok. Would you like to hold my hand?’

“Oh!”  Delilah became aware of the thumb in her mouth and quickly pulled it away.  She looked at her thumb, then folded her fingers around it as if to hide it.  “I’m” she started to say ok, but paused.  She was really trying to be honest with Graham, and honestly, she was anxious.

“I’m just a little – I’m ok – but,” she smiled, letting the anxiety recede.  “I think I would like to hold your hand.” 

MG smiled kindly and reached forward a little more, taking her hand gently in his.

‘Delilah. It could be me. If you would like that.’

Tears welled up in her eyes.  She had been sure he would say no; the relief was overwhelming.  “Thank you,” she said softly, holding back any tears.  “I would like that.”

‘Thank you for trusting me. I promise to look after you and do my best to meet your expectations.’

MG squeezed her hand gently.

‘Now I’m aware that time is moving on and that we had allowed ourselves two hours for our initial meeting. I’m in no hurry but would you like to break there to reflect, gather your thoughts and continue, if you so wish, another time?’

“Oh!”  Shocked, she realized it was 9:30 already.  She didn’t have any work scheduled til afternoon tomorrow, but probably Graham had lots of things he needed to do.  “Yessss, I guess that would be best.” She didn’t want to leave but he was probably right.     

‘As I said I’m in no hurry to leave and there is absolutely no pressure on you to do so. It’s been an intense evening with lots of new ideas to digest. I wouldn’t want you to feel, now or later, that you might have preferred time to reflect.’

“You’re probably right,” she said with a sigh.  “The mature, responsible thing to do is to go home and think it all through.  But – the mature, responsible part of me isn’t exactly the part that wants to, um, get spanked.  THAT part of me wants to see if you’ll do it now.”

MG chuckled.

‘Well then. THAT part of you had better ask for what she wants.’

Delilah laughed, embarrassed and thrilled at the same time.  “Ok.  Yes, I can do that.  Um, Graham, would you show me what it would be like to get a spanking like I described now?  Please?”

MG raised an eyebrow expressively.

‘Please what?’

“Please… please spank me?”

‘Perhaps ask respectfully? A Sir perhaps?’

“Ohhh.”  She swallowed hard, this was – oh, she was getting even more turned on, that was so strange… but “Yes, I’m sorry, Sir.  I didn’t know I needed to… Would you spank me, please, Sir?”

‘That’s better. Good. Well done Delilah. I will.’

He smiled encouragingly.

‘I need to organise a private room, I take it you would prefer that? Would you like to come with me or shall I come back and find you when it’s ready?’

“Yes, please!” she said, “A private room.  I think,” she looked around the cafe and imagined waiting by herself.  “I think I’d like to come with you.  Please,” and remembered to add, “Sir.”

MG stood and held out his hand.

‘Right then young lady. You had better come with me.’

“Yes, Sir,” she said, noticing that his tone had changed, was he starting now?