If you’re looking for a post on self-care, you are not in the right place. “Taking care of myself” is my preferred euphemism for self-pleasuring. Also known as playing with myself. Or masturbation, which I think is an ugly word for a very satisfying experience.
Anyhow. If you’ve been reading here a while, you probably know that I have always been practical and efficient at taking care of myself. No need to wine and dine myself; no need for frills or extras. I’ve embraced the idea of “Wham-bam, thank you, Ma’am” as a direct path to orgasm.
Then there was The Weekend. And my time with Sir in real time on video. I’ve already written about that here: The Weekend and The Weekend -Part Two.
After all the spanking was over, Sir directed me to prop myself up comfortably on pillows, leaning against the headboard. I was happy to do that, feeling very buzzy with pleasure. And then he directed me to touch myself.
No, he didn’t just tell me to touch myself and then sit back and watch. He directed me – he guided me to touch myself the way he wanted. Where to stroke, how hard, where to touch, where not to touch.
As instructed, I toyed with my nipples, pinched them, pinched them harder, harder…and released. I explored sensitive areas with my fingers, and then with my little pink vibrating dildo, toying with myself… exactly the way he told me to.
And somehow, the pleasure grew… and grew… until I exploded in a lovely rush of pleasure, trembling and crying out. It surprised me. It is usually only that easy when I’m alone. But maybe it happened because I was already sated with pleasure, maybe because there was no pressure to reach that peak, maybe because my Sir is just that good. Who knows?
My orgasms were already his to allow or not allow. And Sir has a way of building on the experiences we have. He can’t always be there to direct me, but he can give clear instructions on what he wants. The next time he gave me permission, he added that I had to edge myself before I could come. Twice.
Sigh. Edging doesn’t come easy to me – or I don’t come easy with edging. ☺️. But I managed that time to make it work with my usual strategy – head straight for the finish line. Granted, I had to do it three times, but I got there, so I felt pretty good about it.
The next time he gave me permission, his instructions were different. ”Yes, you may,” he said, “But go slowly. Take your time. NO rushing.” That last admonition is one I’ve heard from him before. “And report back to me,” he added
I spent a lot of time thinking about what I was going to do.
I started with lotion. Massaging my body with lotion, slowly… making it a sensual experience. Not the slap it on-rub it in-and done experience it usually would be.
From there, well, you don’t need to know all the details. But I did take my time. And when the pleasure had built to a throbbing peak of need, I tumbled over the top, gasping, trembling all the way back down. With a deep sigh of satisfaction, I rolled over and went to sleep.
So it’s a rule now. “No. More. Wham-Bam thank you, Ma’ams,” he said.
Of course, I said, “Yes, Sir.”
So now I’m thinking about frills and extras I could add to the experience. I’m toying with the idea of exploring this toy that Nora talked about a while back. {You see what I did there?}. Anyhow, I bought one at the time, but only tried it once, not very successfully. I don’t remember what it’s called – the Red Devil maybe, or something like that. I’ll have to go back and look. It’s a multi-function kind of toy, and you have to connect it to an app on your phone.
It just seemed too complicated back when I was still wham-bam girl, you know? But now that I have a different approach, maybe it’s time to reconsider. Although – potential rules clash – if I have to use my phone to operate it, that won’t work well with my “no screens 30 minutes before bed” rule. I guess it would have to be an afternoon delight. Hmmmm…
I’m curious – what do you do for a more sensual ‘taking care of myself’ experience? What do you really love? Feel free to share your recommendations here. Enquiring minds want to know…

I have cerebral palsy and a shunt. So I am wary of letting myself go (in that sense) I will edge but I don’t think I’ve ever gone over the edge. I don’t live alone so that means what it means 😉
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Kimberlyanne – that sounds like it would be really frustrating. I appreciate you sharing your experience here. It really reminds me how different our experiences of sexuality can be…. 💜💜💜
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♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
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Yes, that’s why it’s so good—essential really to share our thoughts and feelings about our erotic and life experiences. Much appreciate the community here.🙏🙏🙏♥️♥️♥️
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It’s an amazing community, isn’t it?
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Oh, sorry. Do you mean orgasm? Is that what your doctors told you?
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I do. And they haven’t said anything because I’m embarrassed to admit it (I’m also a virgin) so I’m basing it purely on instinct
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Ohh, you are not supposed to orgasm ??
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I don’t really think so? Because the pressure increase is I think (I’ve tried to find information to confirm) the same as a cerebral spinal fluid increases? I haven’t found anything to confirm or deny this though, so I’m just thinking no as it’s better than to risk it you know?
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Ohhh. You poor dear. Perhaps ask a medical specialist to confirm. Bless you
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I appreciate it
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I wish you the best. It must give you some sexual satisfaction reading this blog
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I plead the 5th 😉
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OK, understood:). I get lots of satisfaction from all the writing and supporting comments here. And yes it does turn me on
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Oh, thank you for sharing. Its a beautiful thing to have a space space for us kindred spirits to bare themselves.
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No embarrassment about being a virgin. Everyone was ( or is) at one time.
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I lost my virginity in my 30’s.
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I love that your Sir has taken control in this area AND that he’s directing you to take time and romance yourself a bit. Like you, I can be a bit outcome focused in that department. When I do slow down, sometimes I put a bit of nipple nibbler on my nipples (a product designed to make them tingle a bit) and I lotion myself “down there”. I am in a phase where I am really enjoying ridables. A long, slow ride in the afternoon is quite the afternoon delight! 😘❤️
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Wait – a rideable? Like a Sybian? One of those things that has a saddle and a – um, you ride it and you mount a dildo attached to the saddle? And it sort of bucks? That kind of rideable?
Nipple nibbler? I’ll have to look into that. Attaching nipple clamps is a bridge too far, I think. But a bit of tingle… and a touch of lotion “down there…”.
And why does it crack me up that you write a sex blog and you’re talking about ‘down there?’ I(No, I love that…)
Ok, you’ve given me lots to think about…. 💜💜
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LOL… well, I could use more prolific language, I suppose (blushing a bit). I do love me a good rideable. Here is a link to a rideable that I bought a few months ago…as it is relatively inexpensive, I did not have high hopes. Boy was I wrong! My new favorite: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F9448HYY
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Oh. My. Goodness. That’s really amazing. Oh, I have to think about this…. Hmmm. Thanks for sharing! 💜💜
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Just one submissive girl helping out another 😘
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Yep. 💜
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Girlfriends unite:))
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Nora! Love hearing this:))
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Hi Olivia,
Gosh, I think I’ve gone shy lol. I love how your Sir has taken control and is directing you in this regard too. Love that you are taking more time and indulging in more self care.
Hmm, I guess I am more outcomes focused too.
Hugs
Roz
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Yeah, I think there’s often a certain amount of shyness around this topic.
For sure, I love that he has taken control too. It has really made it a much more satisfying experience. I’m sorry you don’t have any tips for me! But thanks for commenting, as always! 💜
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Humm, can you preprogram the toy? Then you just need to hit start, or perhaps you can set it to work at a specific time? Like an alarm… i know one of our toys has both ‘programs’ to chose from and the ability to make up our own. i also find watching myself in the mirror can be quite the heady trip! lol
i’m very happy to hear you’re taking your time though, even if it is because you’ve been told to! Although, that makes it even better, doesn’t it?? lol 💜
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Hmmm, I’ll have to check out the preprogram possibilities…. Good thought. Watching myself in a mirror would also be – well, interesting…
Yep, being told to do something does add that extra zing to it…. Plus, honestly, if I decided to do it on my own, I do it a couple of times, and then I’d be in a hurry and would skip it ‘just this once,’ and never do it again. I definitely need the accountability. 💜
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Good girl
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Its good to have a guide ♥️♥️♥️
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Informative and HOT post! Gasp. I felt like I was in the room:)))))))))
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Thank you!! Um, it would have been strange if you’d been in the room, but I appreciate the sentiment! 💜
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Blushing–It is a hot fantasy for me…. Gasp
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☺️
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You really take care of Yourself!
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Lol, I try!
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