FFF 10-19

And here we are again.

Reporting in – step count is DOWN.  5,924.  Weight is UP.  I would like for that to be the other way around.  Ok, and maybe my weight is not actually up, but hovering around 156, 157.  Sigh. 

I feel kind of old today.  When I look at the challenges ahead of me, career wise, I just feel tired.  Not quite overwhelmed, but a lack of energy or enthusiasm.  Like it’s going to be so much work, I wish I could just retire instead.  Just potter around all day.  Read books for fun and play with my grand kids.  That kind of for-real retired.

I don’t usually feel this way.  I imagine it’ll pass.  And maybe it’s just because I got some constructive feedback on my website that was really helpful but also gave me an idea of the scope of the work I need to do.

And I need time to devote to it, and focus for it, and even psychic energy.  It’s not impossible.  It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a long time – not exactly in this form, but in some form.

At the same time, the classes I’m taking have a bunch of assignments that challenge me to go deep into myself and explore my feeling.  Pull on my wisdom.  All that good stuff.

So I’d like to feel excited about it.  And I’m sure I will again at some point.  Right now, today, it just seems like a lot of work.  When really, I’m pretty much at an age that lots of people are finishing their careers, not looking to start new ones.

However.  I have a lovely life in lots of ways.  I don’t have to get everything done today, or even this week.  Or month.  I have time.   I need to plan what I’m going to do, build a new timeline.  Look at all the things I want to create and figure out all the steps I need to take and just plan it out.


But I don’t have to do it all today.

11 thoughts on “FFF 10-19

  1. Sometimes looking at the big picture is simply overwhelming …. but I bet you know this already, Olivia :)) … so time to chunk it down … look at the bits and bytes … when your energy is refreshed it will be the right time to look forward again. Hugs! … nj


  2. Hi Olivia, if you think it is time to retire and if the money is right…go for it. Since retiring I have been busier than I ever was in my chosen profession and I am much more productive doing the things I want to do. And I have been taking courses that are in fields that I want to know, not what the boss though I needed to know. Good luck.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi, Don – Thanks for sharing your experience! Words of wisdom for sure! It sounds like you’re enjoying your retirement pretty much the way I’ll enjoy mine – doing things you want to do! Thanks for reading and for commenting!


  3. i “live” an overwhelmed life most of the time. I could say it will pass, but sometimes it doesn’t do so quickly enough. And when it doesn’t and it becomes your new normal, that’s when you realise you’re more than capable of keeping on top of things. And you smile and having beat it – whatever doesn’t kill you and all that. But on a more uplifting note – it’s good that you know it doesn’t all have to get down right now (or yesterday!). One step at a time. Keep moving forward. And soon, yes, this, too, shall pass. *hugs*


    • Hi, Fondles! Yeah, I hear you. It’s not like I ever get caught up, or ever do all the things I need to do, and I’m really used to that. Whatever doesn’t kill you… for sure. I can tell yours is the voice of experience. I did lock in this weekend and spend about 9 hours working on my website and it’s beginning to look a bit more the way I need it to, so that’s a hopeful note. On the other hand, I was not a mediocre babysitter Saturday, and didn’t finish some administrative stuff I had to do. Shrug. Keep moving forward, yes… ❤ and hugs…


  4. YES!! I could have written the post. I am closer in years to retirement than anything else but not ready yet and counting down the years now. Less than 10 which seems like a lot but it really is not. I want to get to 30 years with my company and by then I will be ready to make a change. Sigh… 10 years, 10 years, 10 years. What I have done is started doing more things for “me” and not be so consumed with work which is helping and keeping me motivated. I am running the NYC Marathon in less than 2 weeks! YIKES!!! So yes you can do it, and so can I, but definitely not all in one day.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Faithful!

      Yes, it’s an interesting place to be in a way, heading towards retirement. It sounds llike you have a good plan. Doing more things for yourself is good preparation too, you’re right. I can’t believe you’re doing a Marathon!! That’s super cool – come back and tell us how it goes, ok?

      Right, not all in one day…. keeping that in mind.


  5. I hope the lack of enthusiasm has lifted?
    As a dear friend says to me (when I’m feeling swamped…) What’s the best way to eat an elephant? A bite at a time.

    I find that silly question helps me find perspective.


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