May the Solstice and turning of the wheel
Bring you love, peace, and good fortune
in the coming year.
Let us welcome
The returning sun with Hope and Joy.
May you never thirst.
Before the celebration begins, there are a couple of things that came up in the comments last night that i want to mention, because I want to explore them more in the days ahead. (Unless I get distracted by a new fantasy, which could happen. I have not forgotten nipple clamp girl…)
One perennial argument Roz raised is: Does it take strength to submit and does strength come out of submitting?
Willie raised the other one, and I had to laugh a little reading it. I remember some fairly heated and lengthy discussion at a D/s round table I used to go to around this one on more than one occasion. Is submission a gift? Do we gift our Doms with our submission? Or are we simply being who we are, and trying to get our own needs met in the process?
If you have opinions – strongly held or just a thought – hang on to them because we are going to open that can of worms.
But not today. Today is Winter Solstice, .. first day of winter, shortest day of the year. In the turning wheel of seasons, this is my least favorite, and yet. I am drawn to the idea of hygge.
Hygge is “a Danish and Norwegian word for a mood of coziness and comfortable conviviality with feelings of wellness and contentment.” In winter, that might be staying curled up and comfy by the fire, which is definitely my style. Today, I wish that we all may have a bit more hygge in our lives.
– unless you’re in Australia and thereabouts, in which case, Happy Summer Solstice.
So I invite you to share my celebration, if you like. I’m not actually a practicing pagan, but I’m not a practicing Christian either. Yet my spiritual connection to the universe needs to be expressed. Honoring nature and the rise and fall of tide and season feels right.
So I will begin my day in a most mundane way, by cleaning my office space, which is my sanctuary. But when I tidy and clean in a spirit of love, the mundane falls away and I begin to feel the sacred all around me.
For any ceremonies, I love drums as a background. My personal favorite is Sacred Spirit Drums, by David and Steve Gordon. You can find it on Youtube if my link doesn’t work.
I have a number of symbolic objects on my altar that help ground and center me in the sacredness of living.
Yesterday, I had a client tell me that one thing I had taught her that was life changing was when I said that life is hard. She had lived her life thinking she needed to avoid the hard things, but now she was seeing that life IS hard and life is also beautiful. That both of those things can be true, at the same time.
The path of submission carries this powerful lesson of contrasts and those of us who embrace the path live that truth.
On my blog these days, I sound like a novice, just beginning to experience who I am and what being submissive is all about. But I’ve walked this path before, learned many of these lessons. Then, years ago, I found the way forward was blocked by changing circumstances, my own choices, and commitment to living my values as best I could. Like a caged bird, I’ve been fluttering around trying to find the way out, with little success.
And now, the cage door is open.
We don’t grow in a straight path, we grow in a spiral. As I circle back around, discovering old truths and exploring paths I’ve visited before, I see with new eyes and a fresh perspective. Which is why this Winter Solstice is particularly celebratory for me!
I will do a prayer to the 4 directions, inviting the spirit of the East, place of new beginnings air, and open horizons, the South, place of passion, fire and creation, the West, place of the setting sun, water, and autumn’s whisper, and the North, place of quiet, stillness, of cave and deep earth, into my life. I’ll ask Mother Earth, who nurtures and guides us, and Father Sky, whose light shines upon the earth both day and night, guiding our footsteps to join me and offer their wisdom and guidance. I’ll close my prayer with this:
Oh Spirit of our souls within, Place of union, love and reverence. We are grateful for this gift of life and for the love that guides our way. We open our hearts and join with all in love. It is begun.
Olivia 
Happy Winter Solstice to you! Funny I never look at it as the shortest day of the year, though I do look at the summer one as the longest. Lol. I just look toward the days getting longer starting tomorrow!!!
” But I’ve walked this path before, learned many of these lessons. Then, years ago, I found the way forward was blocked by changing circumstances”
I know this all too well. What I will say, for me – ” Finding myself was far easier than going back to myself”. I am still in the second stage and I have to say ( though with the same partner so there isn’t the excitement of newness there I suppose, it goes beyond trust of self ) returning is scarier! I sometimes , nay often long for the discovery stage when I didn’t know what to expect. I don’t fear the what’s coming down the road, I fear what happens if it falters again. I didn’t have that fear the first time out .
I think it’s better to look at this journey of yours as a novice if you can. This time must be vastly different? Maybe go with the idea of the road not travelled and find your newer self? Or ya know not! Lol. I wish I could is all I’m saying.
willie
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Definitely my winter solstice joy is about the days getting longer!!
I definitely agree – restarting with the same person is super difficult and scary. And the attempt that MP and I made a few years ago crashed and burned.
Those “first times” in submission are so lovely. I am fortunate, it is like starting over with Sir Jon, and if I know how to submit in some ways, I don’t know how to submit to him. Slave shae was talking about that the other day – how “training” a slave (or submissive) is about training them to their Sir/Master’s ways.
Anyhow. Yes, this time is vastly different and being a novice is a lot like beginners mind, and we all know that’s a good thing. Yessss. Thanks, Willie!
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I’d love to hear how it’s different this time for you, compared to the past – if ever you are willing to compare ( providing it doesn’t mess with your current mindset)
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Oh, interesting thought! I’ll have to think about that a bit… thanks
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Happy Winter Solstice, my beautiful friend. It’s funny how nature teaches us everything about life that we need to know. For example, the seasons are always changing, no matter what our preferences. Life is full of impermanence. Time slips away like sand with the out going tide. We just have to learn to open our minds to see these lessons. And of course…the wild teaches us a lot about Dominance and submission. I know that your Dom identifies as an old wolf, and mine prefers to think of himself as a bird of prey, like a hawk or eagle. Both are hunters, while submissives like us desire being hunted and caught, used for their purposes. Thank you for the thoughtful post! XOXO
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Dear Nora – I appreciate this perspective so much – yes, the connection with nature is so powerful and carries so many lessons. I can hear the Buddhist influence in what you say and it reminds me that accepting impermanence is is a valuable lesson.
And yes, like you, this submissive does love being “hunted, caught, and used” – prey for my Dom. Lovely.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! 💜
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Hi Olivia,
Happy Winter Solstice! I am so glad that it’s summer solstice here. Thank you for sharing your celebration.
I’m glad my comment provided food for thought and further discussion and was so pleased to see Sir Jon share his thoughts. It’s always great hearing the perspective of our Dom’s.
Beautifully expressed as always. I love the idea of treating this time as a novice cos, ya know, it will be different.
Hugs
Roz
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Thank you, Roz, I’m glad you liked the post, and the idea of me embracing being a novice tool!! Yes, it is definitely different.
I’m loving your conversation with Sir. It is nice to have a Dom perspective here, and nice to see the exchange of ideas. I’ve missed that from public BDSM spaces.
Enjoy your summer (while I’m out here shivering_ 😊
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