Look it’s me!

i feel like tiptoeing back into my blog here – into my blog?  or onto?  I don’t know.  Either way, here i am.  A little bit embarrassed cause i’ve been gone so long.  i don’t know why, i have just not felt it.

i have lost all libido.  Which is kinda sad – a libido’s a good thing to have, right?

Yeah.  Sigh… i can’t even work up any enthusiasm for self-pleasuring.

i might have been pretty triggered by the Donald Trump crap too.  So many people were, and so many people shared their own stories of having been sexually assaulted, with such bravery.  But it was super triggering.

Anyhow.  Some big transitions coming up in my life, and i’m excited and scared, eager and anxious.

i will have more time unscheduled and am trying to decide if i should:

  1.  Schedule that time in new ways that are productive – for example, i could spend an hour or two a day working on my kinky novel and maybe finish it.
  2. Schedule that time in activities that promote self-care, on the premise it will lead to improved quality of life and eventually increased productivity.
  3. Don’t schedule anything and see how i feel or see what happens.
  4. Some ideal combination of the three that will be balanced and satisfying.

I think number 4 sounds ideal but i don’t think it’s necessarily realistic.  If you have words of wisdom, by all means share them.




10 thoughts on “Look it’s me!

  1. Lovely to see you pop up! Oooh! I like #1 because I would read anything you write and if the novel is calling you, in my experience its best to catch that momentum when you can. But #4 is ideal…so no wisdom but if you have the time and space to feel it out, I don’t think you can go ‘wrong’ here. What feels best? Do that.


  2. Welcome home, lovely lady! The novel might help with the libido, and self-pleasure is a kind of self-care (in my opinion,anyhow). i think you should under schedule, read, take a nap, get a pedi, just take a few days to recharge and then it will become clear what else you need to do. Time to just let your mind wander, you know? In any case, its nice to have options and time. (many hugs)


  3. Nice to see you back…..I would schedule one thing, so you feel you have accomplished something…but leave the rest of the time just to be and see where that leads you…and where ever it does is where you should be…
    hugs abby


    • Thanks, abby, that’s more good advice. The risk with not scheduling anything is that i get lost in frittering the time away and then i wont’ be happy with that. So yes. ❤


  4. I would wait and see if it’s really unscheduled, or if it actually fills up post-haste and leaves you feeling wretched for not being able to get to all the other things you’d already scheduled to fill the unscheduled time.

    Just one woman’s opinion…


    • Thanks, Jz, i bet that’s exactly what happens. The same way needs expand to meet income. My prediction is it’ll take me a year or two to actually get over-scheduled, but it is my pattern…
      Thanks for the input!!


  5. I am SSOOO very not qualified to give any over/under scheduling advice (Took a very experienced Dom 4 years to get me to even admit I was over-scheduling). I just wanted to say “Hi! I’m glad to see you here”.


    • Lol, thanks, Monkey! For a long time over-scheduling was a necessary part of my life – at least, it was if I was going to do anything other than things that HAD to be done – kid stuff, work, bare bones cleaning… It’s such luxury to have a bit of time to play with – for now anyhow. Thanks for saying hi!


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