Celebrating the equinox because right now, there is balance between day and night, poised for this one day. From here, the days will get longer, the nights shorter. Warm winds and sunshine are here, life is good.

And my life is changing.

My word of the year is Rooted. Turning toward myself, listening and acting on what is right for me. Feeling solid and safe and secure in myself. And I’ve been doing that. Letting go of a lot of my “shoulds” (even though my inner critic says I shoulda done that a long time ago… 🙄) and being gentle with myself. Really listening to what I want and need, and acting on that.

And that path has led me to this moment. I’ve agreed to be submissive to Master Jon Grey. Yesterday, he posted this: All’s Well with the World and it seemed like the right note for this post.

If you knew us back in the day, last year, that is, this may sound very different. He wooed me with words then too, but not like his posts in the last week or so. And if you read some of his posts from January when he first came back to the blogosphere, you will see why I didn’t think he was the Dom I wanted or needed.

He sounds different now. He’s also been through a lot and and has learned and grown. But I’m not here to tell his story.

When Sir Jon and I were together before, it was like riding a roller coaster all day every day. Lots and lots of happiness and excitement, mixed with anxiety and insecurity and never quite catching my breath and being solid on the ground. He swept me off my feet back then, and when he left it was a hard drop back to the ground.

When he showed back up on the blogosphere, some of you were worried about me, afraid I would get hurt again. And that’s legit, for sure.

What if he leaves me again? What if he really just hates women? What if he’s just telling me what I want to hear? What if I really am an old fool?

Yes, I hear that. I’ve asked myself those questions. But what if he doesn’t leave again? What if he is being honest? What if I’m actually a wise old woman who can explore and take chances, knowing that even if I do get hurt, I will still be ok? And in the meantime, I’ll get to see if these two flawed people can build a D/s relationship that works. More slowly, on a more solid foundation, feeling supported and cared for and connected in vanilla ways – and getting spanked, required to be obedient to his wants, and being sexually awake and alive in submission at the same time. What if?

May this Season of Rebirth, Renewal, Rejuvenation and Regrowth Be Filled with Blessings, Abundance, Magic and Endless Possibilities

Text from the card says:  
FROM ITS WINTER OF SLEEP, THE EARTH IS AWOKEN, 
THE CYCLE OF NATURE, TRUE AND UNBROKEN
THE PROMISE OF SPRING, OF LIFE, A NEW START, 
TO FILL YOU WITH FAITH IN MIND, BODY AND HEART. 
THE PERFECT WHEEL OF NATURE KEEPS SPINNING, 
WITH PROOF THAT AN ENDING IS JUST A BEGINNING. 
REJOICE IN THIS SEASON, MAY IT FILL YOU WITH PEACE, 
MAY THE BLESSINGS OF NATURE, FOR YOU, NEVER CEASE.

@CrystalLoversTribe