Of course, today I’m celebrating all day that my daughter’s home. Her kids are beyond thrilled. I slept in and don’t have to take anyone to school and am loving it.
I’m also still listening to the Healing Collective Trauma summit – I haven’t gotten to listen to all of it, and can’t afford to upgrade to keep it, but it’s been pretty powerful. So much of it interconnects beautifully with the things I already know or believe.
For example, Otto Scharmer talks about the three things we need to heal:
- To be seen (seeing someone as they really are, not your own projections of what you want or need, but to see them.)
- To be held (holding space for someone to experience what is happening without trying to fix them or change them.)
- To be supported (having confidence that the person is doing their part of the work. That they have what they need to do what they need to do, in the same way that you are doing your part.)
So when we think about the D/s relationship, I think those aspects are present on both sides of the slash. Does that make sense? Or maybe they aren’t. Are those qualities present for submissives as well as Doms? For Doms as well as subs?
Olivia 
I’m here and have been reading along. I was still trying to figure out a way to voice what I thought with the first one in this series. Guess I’ll just give up and move to this one. LOL
I most definitely think in our case those three things are required in our dynamic. Though I shouldn’t speak for B. He processes far differently ( and much slower lol) than I do. Do I see his need for number 2 outwardly? No I don’t. Perhaps it is just a ‘guy’ thing.
willie
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Willie! Hi! LOL, if you ever decide to voice your thoughts on the first one, it’s never too late.
Yeah, I thought you might be able to see them in your dynamic. That’s pretty cool. Thanks for sharing that!
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Hi Olivia,
Hooray for sleeping in lol. Hope you enjoyed your time with the grands. I think these three points are present for both partners, in both ttwd and non-ttwd relationships.
Hugs
Roz
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Thanks, Roz, that whole sleeping thing is pretty great! I did have a blast with the grands, and their mom actually has to go out of town all week next week, so there will be more good times ahead.
Yeah, I think you’re right. Actually, I think those three points belong in vanilla relationships too, and I guess they show up there too, right? But I always think of D/s as being deeper somehow.
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